Potty Mouth

We never thought about raising a child when we started raising the dog.

His name is Jack and he's a cute little bugger. Mostly, he's a good dog. When he's bad, however, he can be a real pecker-head. "Jack," we shout at him when he jumps on people, "off!" Yes. Here we are in Mokpo, South Korea, and if the neighbors could understand what we are shouting, they might wonder why they keep hearing "Jack off! Jack off!" being shouted across the rooftops.

When the dog is in the kitchen trying to raid the trash can or in the bathroom for a midnight snack of cat-poop, we yell, "Screw!" I think I picked up that one from Catch-22: Yossarian is trying to have a conversation with another character and a junior officer walks into the tent. "Screw," he says, hooking a thumb over his shoulder to indicate the subordinate should get scarce. Anyways, the dog hears "Screw!" and knows to get scarce.

The cat, though far more vicious, is much smaller than the dog. When the dog is sniffing his little kitty-behind or trying to get up a game of tag with the reluctant white devil, we tell the dog, "No cat!" This usually suffices to warn the dog that he's taking his life into his paws messing around with the feral feline terror. "No cat!" also works with any animal smaller than the dog: squirrels, chipmunks, birds, other small dogs. It's kind of a catch-all for "Don't be stupid. That thing will mess you up."

So, anyways. Little Gandalf will be here soon enough and he'll hear these things being shouted at the dog on a pretty regular basis. Pretty soon he'll be talking and soon after that he'll be interacting with others among his age group. Oh, my god. What will the other parents think the first time our boy tells one his little friends to, "Screw!" Or when another kid gets too close and Gandalf screams, "Jack off!" And how will Gandalf use "No cat!"? I can't imagine, but it should be embarrassing, I'm sure.





In other news:
I started my own CafePress shop. Click the banner below to look at the t-shirt I 'designed' using a nice public domain photo from the NASA archives. Mariner 9 is the first human-built spacecraft to reach another planet, so it deserves a t-shirt, you know.



Another visit to the baby-doc this weekend and hopefully a baby soon. Rachel is getting a bit antsy. I think her exact words were, "I am never going to be not pregnant." (She says this a lot, along with "David, rub my shoulders" and "I am going to kill you.")

The Difference a Day Makes

After several days of snow and sleet, Mokpo is finally seeing some sunshine. Though we're happy the sun is out (seen below, it is actually setting over Mt. Yudal), Rachel really wanted to see a foot of snow on the ground so she could have a day off.

All is well with us here in southern South Korea. Last year was among the strangest of my life, full of both joy and grief. Here's hoping 2008 is twice as happy and only half as sad.

In other news, Rachel and I have finally reached our wit's ends trying to come up with a name for Baby St. John. Leave a comment (click "Comments" below) if you have any suggestions. Remember these few guidelines:

1. The baby's middle name will be "Allen", so the first name must work with that.
2. The first name must have at least two syllables so we can effectively yell it across the neighborhood at dinner time.
3. No made-up, yuppie, ghetto or hippie names. For example: Soda, Skyler, Synomius, and Starshine are all out of the running.

That's it. If you have an idea, please feel free to share. If you suggest the name we choose, there might even be a cash award.

White Wizard, White Cat

Not much to report from the Land of Morning Calm. This past weekend we had a small beach party and today we got a new washing machine: good times.

Rachel is feeling a constant pressure on her bladder, so she spends most of the day in transit to and from the bathroom. When you stop to think about it, it's really kind of disgusting that there's a little person growing inside of her. The miracle of life is gross. Don't think I'm not excited about the bun in the oven... I'm just squeamish about the baking process. (And the umbilical cord that falls off two weeks after the child is born. Ick.)

Here's a picture of Baby Gandalf. You can't see much, but it's a little early for yearbook photos. (The baby-shaped silhouette is actually just a coincidence. The actual baby, when the picture was taken back in September, was still only a few centimeters across. If you click on the picture, you'll see the large version with the OB/GYN's cursor marking the little guy's location.)



And finally, here's a picture of Bob, the Best Cat Ever, napping in the sock drawer.




BTW: Thanks to Travis and Bella for the use of their scanner!



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Listening to: 08 - Upgrade (A Brymar College Course) [foobar2000 v0.9.3.1]
via FoxyTunes